Ravaged Land: Divided Series - A Post-Apocalyptic Thriller Books 1-3 Read online

  He chuckled and shook his head slightly. “It doesn’t really matter what I think.”

  “Of course it does.” I softened my expression. “You’re just as much a part of all of this as anyone else in this house is.”

  “I’ll do whatever you want to do,” Shawn said, gazing into my eyes. “You should know that by now.”

  I stepped back and crossed my arms as I let out a long, heavy sigh. “God, I wish I knew what to do. The weather here is pretty decent, or at least will be once everything dries out.” I shook my head as if trying to rid of the uncertainty. “We’ll still need food, but maybe we should stay a day or two to rest up? What do you think?”

  “I’ll do whatever—”

  I pressed my fingertips against his lips. “Tell me what you’d do if the decision were completely up to you.”

  I slowly pulled my fingers away from his mouth.

  “It’s not up to—”

  “But if it were?”

  Shawn ran his hand through his hair. “Yeah, I think a day or two sounds good.”

  I shook my head knowing that was the best I was going to get out of him and walked over to the window. For a second, I could almost picture what a magnificent sight the farm must have been before the storms took everything away.

  Shawn stepped up behind me and gently placed his hand on my shoulder. He slowly moved it down my arm, and I tried to hold in a shiver. I could feel his breath near the side of my neck, but he backed away when the sounds of footsteps coming down the hall made their way into the room.

  “House is clear,” Ryder said stepping into the room. He leaned back against the wall and crossed his arms. “I can’t believe this place is in such good condition after all this time. There might be some damage to the roof considering the water-stained ceiling upstairs, but otherwise, this place is too good to be true.”

  “That’s exactly what I’m afraid of,” I said my voice soft. The better the place appeared, the more likely it was that everyone would want to stay. And the harder it would be to tell them we had to keep moving.

  Ryder kicked at the floor with the tip of his boot. “How will you know when you’ve found what you’re looking for?”

  “I don’t know,” I answered honestly. My eyes were glued to the outside scenery. I could see for miles.

  “Maybe this is it,” Ryder said pushing himself off of the wall.

  I shook my head and refused to look at either of them. I didn’t want to see even a slight glimpse of their disappointment.

  “Maybe,” I said, but my voice wavered. “I was thinking just a couple days to rest.”

  If there was going to be some kind of mysterious magical feeling that would strike me when I’d found the place I was looking for, it hadn’t happened with this house. It was a nice place, but still, it seemed as though it was too close to everything. Too close to the city we’d passed. Too close to the last time we’d seen the natives. But maybe one day I’d have to come to terms with the fact that everything was too close to something else.

  In this world, danger was looming around every corner, and that was just the way it was.

  I just wasn’t ready to settle. What worried me was that maybe I never would be ready to settle, but it wasn’t just me that I had to worry about. Our decisions rested on my shoulders. The others waited for my call on everything. What if I’d make the wrong call?

  “What the hell is he doing?” I said narrowing my eyes.

  “What is who doing?” Shawn asked.

  I looked at Ryder over my shoulder. “Logan’s out there. Did you know about this?”

  Ryder nodded, and Shawn looked back and forth between us. “What’s going on?”

  “He wanted to check out the property,” Ryder said with a slight shrug as the front door slammed shut.

  Logan’s footsteps loudly pounded against the flooring as he made his way closer to us. He stopped in the doorway and gripped the frame tightly. His fingertips turned white.

  “You guys aren’t going to believe this,” Logan said, working to catch his breath.

  “What is it?” I said placing my hand on my gun.

  Logan shook his head. “Nothing you need your gun for. Come with me. You guys have to see it to believe it.”

  Chapter 2

  We all followed Logan out of the house, past the brick building toward the back of the property. The door on the brick building squeaked on its hinge as a light breeze blew by.

  Logan led us over an area that had probably once been a field planted with plentiful fruits and vegetables before approaching a wild area where the life was starting to come back to the plants that remained. After we walked around a thick patch of twigs and mostly dead brush, I saw what Logan had brought us out to see.

  “Holy shit!” Ryder said, placing his palms on top of his head.

  Stretched out in front of us was a rather large lake. It spread out beyond the property, but I could see all around it. With all the things that had been left inside the house, we’d be able to boil the water and finally have something clean to drink.

  I wanted to point out that we still had a lack of food, but everyone was so excited about the lake.

  “It’s even better news than what you’re all thinking,” Logan said rubbing his hands together as if he was about to perform a magic trick.

  “What do you mean?” Charlie asked with wide eyes.

  “Well,” Logan said, hesitating as he tried to not to look pleased with himself. He was failing miserably. “I found a couple fishing poles in that storage building. They look a bit rusted, but I think I can probably get them to work.”

  Shawn was shaking his head. “There isn’t going to be any fish in there. Look at the water.”

  The water was rather dingy.

  “We won’t know unless we try,” Logan said, walking backward away from us moving in the direction of the storage building. “Anyone want to help me?”

  Charlie and Abby looked at one another. They both shrugged their shoulders at the same time before giggling and turning to follow Logan.

  Ryder crossed his arms and then uncrossed them heavily. “Well, I guess I don’t have anything better to do.”

  He walked away leaving Shawn and I standing there staring at the water. I cleared my throat and turned to him.

  “I guess we could start boiling some water. Maybe poke around the house a bit to see what else we can find,” I said before chewing on my lip.

  His eyes moved down to my lips, and he swallowed hard. “Have you given any more thought to when you might tell Ryder about us?”

  “I haven’t,” I said letting out a slow breath. “It’s just that—”

  “No, I get it, really I do,” Shawn said lightly brushing his fingertips across the back of my hand. “I’m just so sick of waiting.”

  He looked around before taking a step closer. My breath felt as though it was caught in my throat. Shawn looked into my eyes, and it was almost as if I could read his thoughts.

  “I want to kiss you. I want to touch you… hold you,” Shawn said, inching his lips closer to mine before pulling away. He stepped back and gestured over his shoulder. “But I can’t.”

  “We got the fishing poles!” Logan shouted as they turned around the dead shrubs and bushes, heading our way.

  My heart was racing. I couldn’t shake the feeling that Shawn had just sent coursing through my veins had been intentional. He’d wanted me to feel a burst of passion, only to pull it away.

  I forced a smile on my face but started walking toward the house.

  “Where are you going?” Ryder asked, grabbing my arm gently to stop me. When I turned to him, he dropped my arm as if it were too hot to hold on to. “Everything OK?”

  “I’m perfectly fine.” My lips felt tight in the awkward smile I flashed him. His nose was scrunched up, and he could most definitely tell I wasn’t completely fine. “I just wanted to get started on boiling some of the water.”

  “Oh, I can help you if you want,” Ryder said
still looking at me as if he was trying to figure out exactly what was going through my mind.

  I shook my head. “Not necessary.”

  “Yeah,” Shawn said stepping toward me with a slight bounce in his step. He raised his brows, and a wore a slight smirk. “Because I’m going to help her. You guys, can stay here and try to catch a fish.”

  I turned back and walked back toward the house without waiting for Shawn. He caught up after a few steps.

  “Sorry,” he said without looking at me. “I couldn’t help myself.”

  I sucked in a sharp breath. “If you are going to want him to be OK with all this and understanding, you know so he doesn’t end up hating us, you should probably not act like a dick.”

  “Aw, come on, Emery,” Shawn said placing his hand over his heart. “I wasn’t trying to be a dick.”

  “Then what were you trying to do?” I asked refusing to look in his direction.

  “I… I guess I don’t really know. But I really wasn’t trying to be a dick.” Shawn’s shoulders slumped down a bit as we walked up the porch. “I guess maybe if he gets the hint—”

  My laugh interrupted him. “I think he’s already suspicious enough.”

  “Really?” Shawn said. I caught a look and noticed the ends of his lips curling up ever so slightly.

  “Yeah, really.” Once we were inside, I turned to him and even though I shouldn’t have, I looked into his eyes. “Just try to play it cool, OK? I will talk to him.”

  I turned on my heel, but Shawn grabbed my hand and pulled me back. He spun me around and with his body pressed me against the door.

  I jumped when Shawn abruptly placed his hand against the door at the side of my head. His eyes were focused on my lips.

  “I don’t want you to be mad at me,” Shawn said, his voice low.

  I tried to swallow down the lump at the back of my throat. “I’m not mad.”

  “Good. You know, the best part of this farm, is that it’s big,” Shawn said grinning. “Getting alone time with you doesn’t seem impossible anymore.”

  It was getting hard to breathe. I couldn’t think straight.

  “What happened to waiting until I have a chance to talk to Ryder?” I asked.

  Shawn’s fingers moved down my hair, stopping when his hand touched my shoulder. He cocked his head to the side.

  “That was different. We were always together. But in this house… things can be kept secret.” Shawn’s mouth inched closer.

  I laughed. “Secret?”

  “Until you’re ready. Or until we strike out on the road again.” Shawn shrugged one shoulder. “I can’t hold back another minute, and most of the time I don’t think we should have to.”

  “What happened to Mr. Restrained? It wasn’t that long ago you were pulling away from me!” I said trying to take a step to the side, but Shawn didn’t budge.

  “I warned you my willpower would give out eventually.” Shawn’s lips lightly brushed against mine. “It happened sooner than I thought.”

  Heat rose up around me, it felt as though it was trying to squeeze out every last bit of oxygen from my lungs. I needed to breathe, but my body ached for Shawn’s kiss.

  “Shawn,” I said breathlessly.

  “Emery,” he said back in the same hearth-twitching way.

  Before I even finished my blink, his lips were pressed against mine. He moved soft and controlled at first, but then something took over.

  I pressed my hands against his chest as he gripped my arms. It was like we were both holding on for dear life, afraid of what might happen if we let go of one another. Our mouths passionately moved together as if we were both searching for something that was just out of reach.

  My head tipped back tapping lightly against the door as he kissed hungrily down my neck. His hand slid up the side of my body, and a shiver ran through my spine.

  “Shawn,” I whispered, breathing as if I’d just ran for several miles. I didn’t know what to do or say. The last thing I wanted was for him to stop, but there was some part of me that knew we had to.

  He inched back, his eyes moved down toward his feet, as he let out a heavy breath. The smile that stretched across his face melted my insides. I was tempted to pull him back, but I fought off the urge.

  “Got carried away,” he said shifting his eyes up to meet mine.

  I only allowed myself to look for a moment. Any longer, and I wouldn’t be able to maintain my willpower.

  Shawn’s arms dropped down, and he took a step back. He watched me as he ran his hands through his hair.

  “Shit, Emery,” he said grabbing his elbow. “I’m sorry. I don’t know what came over—”

  “It’s fine.” I let out a slow breath between my lips. “It came over me too.”

  Shawn took another step back as if my words had almost triggered something inside him. Maybe if he didn’t move away, he wouldn’t be able to stop himself a second time.

  I chewed my fingernail for a moment. “But—”

  “Oh, no,” Shawn said shaking his head as he turned away and walked toward the kitchen.

  “It’s just that even if Ryder knew, and was accepting, or whatever, we still can’t let things like that happen.”

  Shawn chuckled. “I don’t know why not? It happened just now, and the world didn’t stop.”

  “Because he could just walk in or something.”

  “Like what happened with Charlie?” Shawn raised an eyebrow.

  I pressed my lips together.

  “I don’t think Ryder is going to take off like Charlie did.”

  “You don’t know that,” I said biting my fingernail again. “Maybe they’d all leave.”

  Shawn opened his mouth but slowly closed it. I could tell he didn’t know what to say.

  It seemed as though Shawn finally grasped why I was afraid to talk to Ryder. Neither of us, wanted them to leave.

  “Maybe we should keep it a secret,” Shawn said, swallowing hard. “You know, until we’re more settled somewhere permanent.”

  “What if we never settle anywhere more permanent?”

  Shawn shook his head. “I don’t know. Let’s just stay hopeful that we will. And really this place isn’t so bad.”

  “We can’t stay here,” I said crossing my arms. “There’s no food source.”

  “What about all the fish they are going to catch?” Shawn asked trying to hold back his grin.

  I snorted. “I’ll believe it when I see it.”

  “Let’s see if we can find something that we can use to collect water,” Shawn said reaching out his hand.

  I took it and followed him into the kitchen.

  The room was well lit from the sun shining into the large set of windows near the empty, dirt-coated sink. Thick layers of undisturbed dust coated the countertops. A plume of dust filled the air when Shawn opened one of the cabinets forcing me to cup my hands over my nose and mouth.

  We looked at one another, both wearing the same surprised expression when we noticed the neatly stacked plates still sitting inside. It was amazing how the home had stayed together so well over the years. It was like it was somehow off of the radar. No one noticed it, or no one cared.

  Shawn knelt down and opened one of the lower cabinets. He smiled before he reached inside and pulled out two large pots.

  When I smiled back, I noticed something on the floor behind him. I narrowed my eyes and took a step closer.

  “What is that?” I asked crouching down to look at the weird metal handle in the floor just under the table.

  Shawn set down the pots on the table and lowered himself to the floor. He reached out and jiggled the handle.

  “It’s a door,” he said brushing away the dirt before turning to look up at me. He abruptly stood up and slid the table out of the way.

  “What are you doing?”

  Shawn rubbed his hands together and bent down, yanking open the door. “I’m going to have a look.”

  I nervously looked around the room and hugged myself. I
t felt as though the room had suddenly gotten colder.

  He placed his foot down on the first step and looked up at me. “Coming?

  Chapter 3

  My mouth dropped open when I looked around the room. It was a small space with multiple shelving units on each wall, and they weren’t empty.

  “Oh, my God,” I said moving in a slow circle. “This is… unreal.”

  There were jars and cans of food stacked on the shelves, and several large bags of rice stacked on the floor. All of it covered in a layer of dust, but it was there, and my mouth was already watering just looking at it.

  “If we tell them about all this, they’re going to want to stay even longer,” Shawn said.

  My brow wrinkled. “We have to tell them.”

  “Maybe we don’t.”

  “What do you mean? Of course, we do. This isn’t something we can keep from them.”

  Shawn shook his head. “It doesn’t really matter since we can’t eat this stuff.”

  He picked up one of the cans and dusted it off. His eyes pinched together as he tried to read something on the can.

  “It expired a long time ago. No one wants to eat it. That’s why it’s still down here.” He placed the can back on the shelf in the exact same spot. “We can’t eat it. Someone could get really sick.”

  “The rice…,” I said kneeling down to examine one of the bags, “we can definitely eat this.”

  “How long can a person survive on rice alone?”

  I stood and put my hands on my hips. “Longer than a person who has nothing at all.”

  “I’m just saying once Charlie sees this it’ll be impossible to get her to leave,” Shawn said.

  He was absolutely right, but we hadn’t had a significant amount of food in far too long. We had to do the right thing and tell the others even if we couldn’t eat anything but the rice.

  “We’ll tell them, and if they want to stay longer than a few days, that’s their choice,” I said rubbing the back of my neck.

  “A few days?”

  “Or whatever,” I said looking back at the bag of rice. The food was tempting me to stay. “Maybe we can find a backpack… take some with us.”